Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We had to coat check the pizza.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
