So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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