Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
