just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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