Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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