would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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