Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
