what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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