we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
why does every cop we meet know your name?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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