She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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