I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
