They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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