I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
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