I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
My breasts were aching with rage.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
