Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
