our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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