You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
