It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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