I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
