Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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