Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
