well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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