I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
