just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize