I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
