Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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