I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
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