Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
