Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
i think i just lost a toe
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
