I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
