What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
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