Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
