omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
