Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
