Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry aceofspades105 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(405): View more from Oklahoma

I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.

Fav 21 1467 846
share tweet
(805): View more from California

Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...

Fav 36 1532 3811
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?

Fav 8 4650 882
share tweet
(816): View more from Missouri

I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now

Fav 23 1686 3298
share tweet
(815): View more from Illinois

I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.

Fav 18 7346 946
share tweet
(518): View more from New York

i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday

Fav 10 3290 1139
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(843): View more from South Carolina

i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning

Fav 15 4088 1031
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(518): View more from New York

Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you

Fav 0 522 280
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(805): View more from California

Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n

Fav 0 23 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT