"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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