when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
