I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Randomize