I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
