why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
