Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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