Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
