Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
