lets start a swedish sibling band together
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
