We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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