There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
