? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
