Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
