i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I just had sex on a roof
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
