worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
